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Archive for June, 2012

A Woman’s Bill of Rights

Wow so it turns out that I’m not very well suited to blogging regularly. I want to write this, though, so here it is.

Disclaimer: I wanted to title this post “A Woman’s Bill of Rights”, but I think it stands more as just general dating expectations. (Ted and Robin would have saluted just now). I’m a straight guy, so I guess man/woman relationships are personally what I want to write about. Anyways… back to the words.

A WOMAN’S BILL OF RIGHTS

1. A woman has a right to terminate her relationship with you at any time, for any reason. She might be a real b-word for doing it depending on the circumstances, but you have to respect her decision. Don’t call her. Don’t email her. Don’t text her. Don’t show up to her work, class, or home. That is called verbal abuse and/or stalking, which are pretty much, like, crimes.

2. A woman has a right to privacy. Don’t look over her shoulder at her text messages. If they were for you, they’d be on your phone. Don’t stalk her wall, and especially ecially ecially don’t ask her for her Facebook password. If you don’t trust her, you probably shouldn’t be dating.

3. A woman has a right to exclusivity. Maybe I’m just hella old-fashioned, but, ain’t no such thing as a two-woman man. (or more than 2. I feel like that’s implied). I’m talking about faithfulness, and if you can muster it, I’m talking about what the internet is good for. It’s all just distractions to keep you away from true intimacy with anyone, if you ask me.

4. A woman has a right to chivalry. Yeah. I can dig it. So you probably will never have the reflexes to beat your lady to the car and open the door for her before she just opens it herself, but there’s a lot of stuff that people think is ok that is just bleh. Like seriously? Pay for her. You can do it. Treat her with respect. It’s in the Good Guy Greg handbook somewhere. (If that’s actually a handbook please let me know.)

Anyways, I have like work and things to do.

-andybiar